StaticNomad

Hello, hooker with a penis.

I like your title as it's a good absurd idea and a pairing of two powerful words.

First minute sounds almost nothing like what I'd expect from you. Dreamy, jaunty, sort of Celtic stuff for dancing gently to at the mediaeval summer fayre (olde spelling there) with some local maiden/wench. Not really my sort of vibe but then I'm not really into folk or Celtic music.

Just after you bring your fave taiko loops in around 0:53, it gets much more my kinda vibe, mostly cos that lead g plays a good tune and it's a heavier feel. I am enjoying my time in your booby-trapped valley more now.

1:40 I like the groove you drop back into. This is so acoustic-sounding and I'm not particularly noticing cello, violin or flute.

1:55 start of the most standout and "centre stage" lead g work from you I've heard. Quite restrained playing and not at all flashy. Ironically for you, there seems to be a bit of lack of bass in that section though maybe I should listen on better headphones.

A fairly neat ending, much better than a fadeout.

Oh shit, there's a tripwire straight ahead...

BOOM!!!

Ephemeral regreetings.

I am only stopping by momentarily, and then I will be gone - possibly to the afterlife.

" it sounded way too dismal and dreary"

No - must have just been your mood as it's more beautiful than sad. Sometimes I go through a whole day or thinking the music I'm currently working on (and sometimes even pretty much everything I've made) is either pretty crap or, at best, just not good enough. Sometimes I abandon it for a while, open it up again and realise it's pretty awesome. Sounds like you did something similar here.

"life is short."

Yes but as the comedian Chris Rock said a while ago in a standup show: "Life is real long if you end up with the wrong woman". Or something like that.

No need to peel your eyes anymore as here is the link to my Tool cover, which will most likely kick your ass and smear your face in the concrete...

What It Takes To Step Through

https://www.looperman.com/tracks/detail/168812

P.S. How are Spiv's friends dying from "traps"? Booby traps? Animal traps? Police entrapment?

Yo.

This sounds pretty damn live. How was this made/recorded?

First bass part has quite a bit of reverb on it. A powerful sound.

It's overall quite loud and busy, with lots going on eg that tinkly piano panned right and the additional female vocals. They don't add a lot for me but sound like the sort of thing a band would do live.

Drums are perhaps a bit drowned out but hold the groove down well.

As it's so busy and loud, I could have done with an instrumental break, just to give the listener a break, collect his/her thoughts and get ready for the vocal return. I feel I could do with some more space and room to breathe and think with a track like this. It's not metal.

Quite a skilful ending after the drums have stopped. I appreciate that and it's much more intelligent than just a simple fadeout. Shame it cuts off too abruptly.

Good work, Wordy.

Yo, Spiv.

This is pretty cool stuff and I like it much more than I expected. I thought it would just be a load of squelchy synth noise.

Your main riff is a good and insistent one and a bit like some driving dirty guitar work from quite a few bands. I play riffs like that.

New melodies and weird noises enter when things kick off properly on 0:42.

My only complaint about the drums is that they stay very much on the minimal, closed hat side of things whereas some crashing or ride cymbal work would make this take off a lot more and provide some nice drum contrast. I know we differ a lot when it comes to, let's say, "drum philosophy", so I guess you've done what you wanted.

Some definite trippy, psychedelic druggy synth elements in here and you can definitely groove to it.

A good mix too even though I understand that it's supposed to be lo-fi and dirty.

Is that "uh oh" sample from The Teletubbies children's TV show?

Congrats, Mr Spiv.

Greetings, sad NeoMorphinBro.

I am feeling the sadness here but more beauty, actually.

Good pad intro - sounds like it might be a trance track but no. However, I feel the drop into some tasty guitar playing feels slightly abrupt. Could be nice if you were to keep another perhaps subtle pad going underneath to ease that transition. So, a bit like what is happening when you reintroduce the pad around 1:35.

Some good gently strummed guitar chords and 0:52 tasty little fill and then some cool harmonics. You're moving around the neck quite tastefully in this one.

1:55 can I hear some distant choir voices?

I agree that this is probably a little too short. I'm thinking maybe add another minute or so.

In other Nomad-based news, I am putting finishing touches to perhaps my most badass ever track - a cover of Tool's exceptional 46&2 - only synths and drums, no guitar or other instrument playing from me on it. Look out for that being uploaded to a Looperman website near you in the next few days.

Congrats on this though I feel you can do a little more with it...

Yo.

This here be some deep, smokey blues!

Guitar early on is cool. Nice lazy drum groove. Only complaint about it is that maybe the kick could be a bit louder.

Sax works really well. I don't have many good sax VST instruments in my musical arsenal so perhaps I should look about for something better. Good, expressive sax (synth) playing too.

Just a cool, lazy laidback-as-fuck blues jam.

Guitar is maybe a bit too loud at certain points, overshadowing the groove a bit but not that big a deal. Beat is still pretty strong and insistent.

Piano (especially high tinkly notes) is also good.
Perhaps the track is a bit too long as it doesn't have too many obvious changes but that suits this kind of vibe.

Overall: well done on an authentic late night blues jam.

Word up, WordyBro, says me.

So sorry for not yet sending you any demos to rap over. I keep putting it off but do still have some initial ideas that I keep meaning to send. I'm also putting off sending someone all my stems so he can do a remix of a track dedicated to him. That's a lot more work than just sending you a couple of MP3s.

Anyway: foreboding intro. Piano and some added buzzing pads. Then the drums are pretty tight and powerful. 0:35 how are you doing that drum fill? Other good and varied drum fills keep popping up.

People can groove to this and your assured and mature vocals lead us through the slightly dark, haunting journey like a good master of ceremony. Interesting lyrics, as always.

My only real complaint is a lack of an obvious change. That would really make it take off and give us a bit of a break from the incessant nature of the track. And then you can have fun returning to that main groove and idea.
Mix sounds pretty good though I guess you know the end is chopped off too abruptly.

Good Wordywork...

P.S. New sort of chillout hip hop track from me:

Rhomboid

https://www.looperman.com/tracks/detail/168647

And I'm back...in black*

Not much to do at work so I'm replying to you yet again.

G minor for your vagina totally rhymes without using a Brooklyn accent. The "-inor" and "-ina" are perfect rhymes. Unless you're saying one of those words a bit weirdly (admittedly, to my English ears). I couldn't hear a huge amount of accent on your 'Speak Up' thread recording but maybe you have some little quirks, like saying "minor" more like "my gnaw".

I know you sometimes trawl through the Rock tracks but, damn, going 100 pages deep is some serious searching. The kind I couldn't be bothered to do. Would take ages.

You could do with expanding your musical horizons beyond bass g and guit fiddle but you know what you like by your age so I guess there's no real point in suggesting anything. You also occasionally listen to some of my occasional guit-free tracks.

One of those will be the 46&2 cover, which is going fairly well though there's no obvious end in sight as my hugely rearranged structure is a bit confusing to work with. I'm looking forward to unleashing this ass-kicking riff-fest on your hopefully highly critical Tool-soaked ears but must wait until it's done.

I've gone through the awesome lyrics and have got so many potential titles for it. Right now, I'm going with What It Takes To Step Through as that's the coolest, most life-affirming vocal. Very powerful delivery. Make other title suggestions, if you like. Wallowing In My Own Chaotic Insecure Delusions is another contender.

"mystical bit comes only from all the sitar"

There's really not that much in my music though perhaps there are some layers of sound that give off a related vibe. I do actually have a real sitar but never even play it as them cheesewire strings are lethal bitches. Torture/death scene in a movie could just be forcing a guy to play heavy sitar riffage for an hour or so (till he bleeds out).

Here's my shortest track on Looperman (3:59!!!) that features some tasty guit fiddlin merging with sitar. Not sure if you've heard it.

Random Acts Of Human Kindness

https://www.looperman.com/tracks/detail/155503

We will talk more, cheap whore.

*A temporary ethnicity reassignment. Also grants me the moral license to liberally sprinkle that N word over every sentence I utter. Such freedom...

Sup, my Sub-Saharan*

It's not brilliant but there is something I like about China-High for your lazy eye.

My final, for now, offering:

G minor for your vagina**

I'm pleased with that one as I couldn't find anything music-related to rhyme with 'cunt'.

I have listened again to your Star Forge and noted the additional niceness you have injected.

Wah is much improved and acoustic g is particularly strong.

The thing I like most about the overall track is how much it sounds like an actual band. I guess some sections of my music sound like that though it's not really something I try to make happen. It can also be cool if it clearly doesn't sound like a live band. I just try do whatever sounds good.

I guess it's about not playing too perfectly and in too uniform a manner and having a good dynamic range. You've probably noticed a whole load of Looperman tracks that you can see are mere copy and paste jobs without even listening to them ie that's what the waveform shows (same thing repeated, with no dynamic variation or surprises).

With the ending here, I thought "Oh no, another basic fadeout" when the fading started but then it turned into something more elegant and enjoyable.

Regarding "somewhat mystical", I'm surprised you got the word wrong as you clearly meant 'mysterious', which is not the same thing.

But I'm only mysterious because there's all sorts of stuff that I haven't revealed about myself. I had no idea that was any sort of issue or that anyone I'd never actually met would be particularly interested in hearing my general, perhaps boring, life details.

"you seem to be a bit private"

Not really - I just don't get into loads of personal details on a site in which I talk 90% about music. I only ever chat occasionally about non-music stuff to a select small group ie The Valve, Crucethus and maybe a couple of others. It's only with you that I go off into substantial deviations about anything and everything weird and wonderful.

"others would think less of you if they saw you as a normal person"

I never considered that and don't really think much about my image. On this site, I'm just a musician and maker of nice tracks bro.

I can answer some other personal detail questions if you like.

"a sonic super-villain who travels to other dimensions and worlds and returns to display the other-worldly soundtrack and cosmic vibrations"

I like that description and it is what I'm trying to do, though through instruments and software as I can't yet afford a spaceship.

Later, (G) stringbreaker.

*A vague ethnic grouping chosen entirely for its alliterative qualities.

**Or maybe that should be V minor - the special, hidden vag chord.

A kick to your dick*

Shame on me for not thinking of 'slide for your hide'. But maybe 'hide' is a bit subtle/leftfield in terms of anatomy. That's why I thought I'd enlist your help as my earlier list was all I could manage. Oh no, here's another:

Drumroll for your dickhole

I don't like the organ or shaker attempts.

Damn, I see now that you've updated this track, potentially converting it into a nicer track bro. I will listen later, when I'm able. So, just a reply to your reply for now.

Now it has been explained, I get and appreciate your "two hunches" joke. Not a bad one at all. Quite subtle - too subtle and elliptical for me before so explanation was needed.

"The only kind I'm good at"

I disagree.

I wonder why you think I'm somewhat mystical. Must be some element of my writing I'm unaware of. I'm not really - more just a joker with a strong and bizarre imagination. My butler writes all my jokes for me (including this one) so you can blame him for any air of mysticism.

Kayaking through London was OK but I felt a bit unwell doing it in the heavy afternoon sun and with some serious chop from the tidal river's waves. Couldn't get out of the boat (ie land anywhere) for about 5 miles so quite a relief when I did. I hung out with a bunch of people living in a disused restaurant by the river, which is just above the little beach where I tied my boat up.

So: more thoughts later on your update, if I have any.

I bid you a Jew

*A standard, friendly greeting in masochist circles.

Greetings.

I try to as often as possible.

I agree that the filtered vocals could be lost as they don't fit the rest of the track quite so well.

0:20 that trance synth I'm not so keen on but I like things a lot more when we hit that beat on 0:45. Quite a light, breezy sort of 80s feel to it. Good, fun stuff on the dancefloor, with quite a cheerful sort of melody.

1:01 extra percussive elements are useful additions.

The rest is mostly more of the same (so, not much for me to add) but all nicely done so congrats on this.

Bass for your face
Drums for your thumbs
Keys for your knees
Guit fiddle for your middle

No keys in this but you get the idea. Any other instrument-anatomy connections?

I would not have guessed I would care much for Elvis. I never listen to his music but do like a few songs and greatly respect him and like him when I see him interviewed.

I was in Memphis for 2 days and was booked in to visit Sun Studios and Graceland as part of the music-related holiday I did (3 days Chicago, 2 Memphis, 6 New Orleans, 0 Ozark meth land).

3:07 wah is OK - bit like dance music synths there. Not great but OK and short so no big deal but removing it would not hurt the track at all. Maybe best to do that as it's so brief.

3:29 lead has a horn kinda quality/mood. Strange, eh?

Fadeout ending is a bit of a copout, something I've said before. I think you've even changed and improved fadeout endings I've complained about.

"TWO kinds of hunches"

Can't say I really got that reference.

Fear not, the butler will not disclose your email. I have no need to do a background check on him as he was conceived and raised specifically for buttling duties. Those bred for specific roles can always potentially stray and betray their masters so I always keep a close eye on him, just in case.

Consider this track fully reviewed.

I'm off kayaking through central London tomorrow and then at the weekend on other side of the country (towards you but that ocean would take a while so not this time).

I bid you adieu.

Gree-fuckin-tings

I have not been to a Sun Factory but I did go to Sun Studios in Memphis in 2013. And then visited The King's house nearby, with its incredibly low walls - perfect for keeping out absolutely none of his hordes of fans. I still don't get that.

This has a cool and badass vibe, with the intro quite the acoustic surprise. Sounds kinda folky and 12-stringy.
Yet another reverse lead-in to take us into the drums. I'm not specifically complaining about it here, just pointing out that maybe you've done it too often across your body of bass work.

First riff has balls and a different and fine tone from you. 0:30 guitar slots in nicely. Quite a cool melody.

1:00 killer trill. Badassery fading away to take us into the next section.

Drums are pounding and faultless. Mostly those Sintheticrecords loops?

1:46 key change to make things more progressive.

2:00 octave bass jumps more like funk bass. Not something you do often.

2:23 cool percussive tones. Lovely layering of percussion.

This is really far out progressive stuff. Not like my psychedelic stuff but something else. More like prog rock.

Running outta words so I'll finish the review another time.

Great production, no real suggestions so far.

Later, private parts investigator.

Regreetings.

I'm listening again and enjoying that cool intro once more. Really tasty playing that's highly evocative of a certain landscape and mood.

Can't say I can hear them Texan scorpions in the mix but they're probably subtle, no doubt adding some extra bite/sting. Or maybe that's what they're adding in the second half.

1:51, 2:00,2:08, 2:10 audio pops (from edits, I presume). I can't be much more specific than that.

Right, I've worked out a bit more of the problem when the drums enter: there's a distinctive lack of bass.

Beat is OK but could be better. Also, it's too repetitive - just sounds like a single 4 bar loop. No drum fills aren't helping push the guitar the way they could/should.
Fadeout ending also isn't good enough. Some sort of change into something slightly different and maybe more epic would make for a more memorable conclusion.

Finally, my favourite drummer joke, and it is drummer-specific, unlike the girlfriend/homeless one, is:

What do you call a drummer who can keep time?

Roland.

No one gets that if they're not a musician and thus have at least heard of Roland drum machines.

Oh and thanks for your kind words about me in that Looperman family thread. More on that later...

Deep Texan word ups, Neo Morphin Comanche.

Lovely guitar playing for your intro. Didn't know you could play like that. Very laid back and sounds like it probably wasn't played to a click. Sounds like you're out there in the desert communicating with Indian spirits via the fretboard.

Might even be a coyote in there - Valvedriver has them in a track or two as they live near him. None here in England so I asked him to send me some but no sign of the package yet.

1:20 we come alive with some chunky tone and tasty, muscular grooving. I can hear some audio pops in there though so maybe you've edited together a few bits. Doesn't all sound smooth.

2:19 Oh no!!! That beat really doesn't fit, both timing-wise and in terms of the mood and vibe. Real letdown when it came in. Sorry but I do try to be honest. I was enjoying it quite a bit before then.

Just play around with some other grooves and kit sounds. That one is too light and electronic. Electronic could work well as something different rather than predictable crashing rock kits but this isn't it.

If you can fix your drums (a lot) you would have a cool track.

Tasty guit fiddlin' all the same.

Best of luck to you.

Wow, just got your reply.

Only took you one whole year to write it!

I'd completely forgotten about this track so the reply was a surprise.

I wrote quite a detailed review, which seemed to have been ingored so I think really need to reconsider and write a lot less. Maybe save the longer reviews for people who I know will appreciate them.

I see someone else has also pointed out the problem of the gap between the first and second lines.

Aha - I now see you've fixed the intro so I will listen again when I'm able and maybe comment again.

See you in a year...

Tropical greetings to thee.

Cool guitar sample and fat kick/clap intro.

All the guitar work in my many tracks is made up from unwanted riffs and solos and general neck noodling from people such as David Gilmour, Slash and James Hetfield. I just whip them into some sort of decent shape after collecting them from the trash outside these classic guitarists' houses.

Everything's sitting nicely in the first 30 secs and good swooshing delay to take us into the first breakdown. Then a good programmed, percussive synth part and the delayed return of that guitar part.

Beat's gotta come back big and strong. But you delay it to introduce a new synth part and then do a typical dance fill around 1:40 before bringing it back. Then another breakdown though I feel 1:45-2:20 should be quite a big longer.

You've built energy up there but then you take it away only 45 secs later. And then build it up again for a while, with more obvious bongo type of percussion.

So, I think there's a bit too much building up and not enough stomping grooving away so altering that arrangement might help quite a bit.

Good stuff anyway - clean sounds and pretty well mixed.

Greetings, ER.

I like the little trick you've played on many people here. It's almost a test of how much of a track description people can be bothered to read. This is almost the longest I've ever seen and mine tend to be reasonably long.

You've also fooled people because it does sound pretty accurate and realistic in terms of the recording scene you initially describe.

Congrats on a fun bit of soundtrack work.

Maybe you could do another one that's a bit more audacious.

So: I'm thinking you're supposedly out mountain climbing and you come across some guy and rescue him and then you both break into song.

Or, you get some guy hold you up in the street with a gun demanding you hand over your stuff. Then you break into a song he happens to like and then he joins in and lets you go because he likes you. Maybe you go to a bar for drinks.

Ideas to run with...

Ave*

Supple X is not bad. You like to run words together to create puns. There's a probably a name for that.

How the hell was I supposed to get the Adam Sandler mosh-pitting reference? Definitely a long story to get to the punchline, which wasn't great, but I forgive you.

Don't know if I've heard an Adam Sandler album of comedy skits but I do remember a very funny song called At A Medium Pace, in which I think he goes on about shoving a shampoo bottle up his ass. You'll enjoy that one (not that I'm saying you're into shampoo-shoving).

I don't have any signs giving away my lair location. It's not open to the general public, just my special crew. So, we don't even get pizza deliveries. Gotta make our own.

Wind In The Willows is not at all fresh in my mind. I wasn't sure if you'd even have heard of it in Ozark country/Yankland.

This is how it came to me: the words "bass bro" or "bro of the basses" often go through my mind when I'm thinking of you so I was trying to come up with an alliterative greeting and go to "Bro Of Bro" and then "hall" just popped right in.

Never read Catcher In The Rye but then I'm no great reader even though I love words and ideas and stories. I have enjoyed reading at various points in my life and find it unlike anything else but just never seem to make time for it. I never read books at home, only when occasionally travelling on trains or planes. It's tricky on a bike or when kayaking.

I can't keep removing butler body parts or he won't be able to adequately perform his important buttling duties.

Damn, I've turned this track into our online chat page. I guess you don't mind. I wonder what percentage of your many track comments are mine? Might even be something like 20%.

Pasta urethra, baby (a Terminator 2 reference)

*Latin equivalent of "Yo, what's up, mothafucka?" and also very nearly your name backwards.

Manponic salutations, Bro of Bro Hall*.

I like your manpon idea. Makes me think of Nippon and apron.

If Big Pharma isn't working on my dick pill idea, what the hell is it working on? They need to drop all this silly Aids and cancer research and get on these alternate flavours right away. Humanity needs this. With more dick sucking, we can evolve and travel to the stars.

Just think: to get some head, you'd merely have to find out what sort of food a girl liked and then get that flavour. So, maybe Chocolate Chip Cookie or perhaps Hamburger and Fries With Extra Gherkins. Or, if you're a guy who prefers to be clean but your lady is of a dirtier persuasion, you could get Super Strength Old Dick Classic, just for her.

You could probably even get custom flavours created for you. So, you ask your lady's grandmother for her special apple pie recipe and then send that off to the pill manufacturer and they send you back Sarah's Grandma's Homemade Apple Pie flavour. That's going the extra distance to please your lady, right?

No other thoughts on your Quercus offering, just a late response to your thoughts.

"Have good mosh-pitting!"

No idea if that's a reference to the wedding I said I was going to. I went and it was OK. No mosh pit, which is a damn shame seeing as the groom is an extreme metaller and his bandmates (and other former bandmates) were all there. Not a single bit of metal played by the DJ, which I think is just plain wrong.

"Governments aren't corrupt. Where did you get that wild idea?"

A good few times I've had Special Forces types creep up on me in my lair as I'm knocking out some riffs. Sliderman normally stops them from tunnelling in but sometimes I have to deal with them myself. A good Ozark resonator uppercut to the jaw usually does the job. That's one heavy, solid guitar. I've had to relocate the lair a few times but they keep eventually tracking it down. Must be a mole inside my operation. Could be the butler so I shall investigate.

Good luck once again with tend icing.

*A Wind In The Willows reference ie Toad of Toad Hall. I imagine you living in an Ozark country castle named Bro Hall.

More nice, spacious chillout work from you.

That vocal sort of synth is quite cool eg 0:48. I like it even more when it has lots of delay added to it a bit later on.

Gets funkier with the beat on 1:21.

Overall: a lazy, meditative piece that doesn't have any really big, exciting high points but is very relaxing. Kind of one simple idea for a few minutes. Good soundtrack music.

Hi.

That bass sample is pretty cool and has some "real played acoustic instrument vibe" to it.

So, a pretty cool laidback hip hop vibe you have here, with some fun coming from the spoken word samples.

However, it gets a bit too samey and boring after a couple of minutes and doesn't change after that.

If you could get just one change in there, that might help quite a bit.

Wow, this is brilliant work.

As the track progresses, it keeps surprising me with how well it's put together.

I wasn't expecting so much fat groove and drum work from a track in 'ambient' but I agree it's perhaps best in that genre.

It's quite a loud track but that makes it kick really hard.

There's also a lot of beauty here eg 1:28 delayed synth. It moves perfectly. And 3:36.

2:11 good bassline I wasn't expecting. The kick is so powerful but the track has a lot of space in it.

Last 90 secs are both beautiful and a bit dark.

A definite favourite for me.

I must check out more of your work.

Do you have anything you think is better than this?

Metallic greetings.

Not seen your name on here before. I'm sure I would have noticed as it must be a Soundgarden reference (a favourite band of mine).

This is some pretty thick, powerful stoner metal.

There's a bit of an abrupt panning problem with the intro at 0:05. That could be a lot neater.

1:35 same thing happens again.

0:50 lead is awesome. Not that heavy a tone but cuts right through the mix.

Drums are OK but sound a bit unnatural. Seems like kick and snare aren't quite playing with the hats. Not sure why.

How are you doing the drums? Software programming?

Overall: pretty good stuff searching for vocals to make it a complete piece. Good luck and also with the mix. That panning issue can easily be fixed...

Finally, here's some unusual metal made by me:

Valvedriven

https://www.looperman.com/tracks/detail/163181

Hey, man.

I hear this as pretty generic kind of stuff that I generally wouldn't listen to.

However, and this is the good bit, as I'm listening I'm finding myself more and more impressed with how it's all been put together.

0:45 extra drums make this kick somewhat like a mule.

Then some fun dubstep leads and bass. And I say that as someone who mostly hates that sort of dubstep. But it would work just fine on the dancefloor.

1:49-2:28 is a skilful long build.

"a lot of mixing issues going"

No, sounds pretty damn good to me.

Overall: these are sounds I've heard many, many times before so they don't really move me emotionally. But, it's very well crafted and has a big, fat sound. For people into this kind of thing, I think it's really good.

Congrats