JamesDavies

Ok beat, I like the unorthodox beat but you're gonna need some really strong vocals for it to be any good. And the tone and content has to be kinda dark I think, this has a funeral organ feel to it.

Great potential!!

The beat is out on alot of the song but once that is fixed up it'll be great!!

I reccommend investing in some better software aswell, it'll really come in handy in the future :)

KUTGW
theFISHface

......I don't think vocals are your thing man. You need a lot, and I mean TONS of practice. Intention is definitely there, kudos for that.

i don't know what to say but try using autotune on your voice when u sing. also, the rap has potential but needs better EQ changes. Don't give it up though man, you could be famous one day yaknow?

The drums and instruments are really out of tune. But i vaguely heard "Dangerous".

Great effort, my friend, made me smile :-)

All The Best

John

ugh good intro but it is kinda messy

laying down your own drum tracks aren't the easiest thing to accomplish. It really sounds like you have been working on it. Try to start out with a basic beat using just the kick and a snare. Then you can always layer a high hat or some combination of various percussion. I agree that something like a bum tschak bum bum tschak is a good place to start. The synth tracks sound okay. It sounds like you have a bit of an oriental melody going on. I like that. You are doing better at keeping everything in the track synchronized. Keep working an practicing, it's definitely paying off.

try to do something more simple. Good luck.

use bit map champ... thiis a mess...keep it up!

Hi James...
the drums are a bit "too random".. To improve your beats you could simply start with bum tschak bum bum tschak.. keep it up!!!

I don't know what that was but I just can't get with the beat. I know you said for fun but I guess some people liked it so "Keep'em comin & Keep'em movin".

Yeah nice work in here once you pull it all together.

I see the potential in this

just focus a bit and tighten up what needs fixing and keep rolling.

Beat is ok.
Raps are quite cool (reminds me a little bit of the Streets... UK-HipHop from France.)
But Bro: Kick out the singing passages and concentrate on your raps and your flow.

Hold on.. rewind.. stop everything. I'm hearing the beginning of a future star in this track. Admittedly there are production issues but listen to that rapping on it's own. Cancel everything else out. I'm getting quite an accomplished flow going on here. You understand how a rap should come across. Loving the effects on the rap portions of this song. The way that the sound is thrown about in my ears to emphasise certain words. It's there with that beat banging behind it.

There is quite a lot of noise on the vocal track(s).. I'd recommend playing around with the mic input level until there is more of your voice in there than background noise.

Overall though a solid effort in my opinion. Look forward to hearing more from you in the near future James :)

No ur not a rapper or singer sorry bro

nice start dude, dont get discouraged and keep working i iknow you will get it!

Too many people want to rap and sing these days straight with no practice...

It's pretty good like the beat of it. It sounds like some beats don't belong in some points of the song. It feels overlapping in some parts of the song. I like the way you set it up. Nice job.

As hardwareexorcist sayed . Your vocal is so messed up . Its like taking a mic and scream into it . :(

DOPE!! im feeling this ! dont forget to check out my track and leave your reviews as well.

I have to be honest here... I almost didn't make it all the way to the end of this track. I'm curious as to what software you use, other then Audacity. In any case this track made me feel like i was experiencing the worst DJ set in the world!!! please fix the timing on the "loops" that you used. Also I recommend that you look for some torrents of sequencing software (or figure out the math to timing without sequencers). Furthermore, I agree with Bear... It is wonderful that you are starting out so young. I got started on production when I was about 16, all i had was Sound Forge. Which is a great sound manipulation software but not a sequencer, which means that at first all my sequencing was done in "copy paste" format.

Peace and Love
Drums and Bass

It looks like I'm late to the party. It also looks like this is one of your first songs and it is a pretty good start young Jedi. The timing issues will work themselves out.

Actually, there is a thing in music called "syncopation." A syncopation or syncopated rhythm is any rhythm that puts an emphasis on a beat, or a subdivision of a beat, that is not usually emphasized. A quick search on the Internet should get you a lot of information on syncopation and why it's cool to use in music.

The great thing about all of this is you are only 13, yet you are producing some pretty good music. Just keep at it. I started at the age of 5, and here I am, 53 years later and I'm finally starting to figure it all out (I majored in music and graduated from college with a music degree).

Congratulations on a good start here on the Loop. Just stay with it.

Bear

there's some good ideas here, but you really need to work with some software that'll allow you to sync your loops. i recommend using FL. it's a great entry level package that'll grow with you. i still use it, heh. it's got a great slicer in it, so out of sync loops will be a thing of the past. and you don't even have to worry about what BPM they are, the slicer automatically cuts up a loop and sequences it in the master BPM. but yeah, get yourself a good DAW to work with, learn the basics of it and you'll see improvements in your work immediately. feel free to PM with any questions you might have about anything tech related, i've been doing this for a long time and might be able to help you.

this song has some really cool sounds going on in it. you did a great job selecting the sounds here. like toddj said, this could fit in glitch really well. maybe ambient if you added the right drums and bass. i can here this song going in several different directions, actually, depending on what elements you added and how you mixed them. or you could leave it as it and it would still stand alone quite well. good job, man.