My Friend Jim Died

Posts 1 - 12 of 12
  1. 308224
    theHumps : Wed 18th Mar 2020 : 2 years ago

    The phone rang mid morning and it was from Jim, I knew he was moving back into his newly renovated house last Wednesday so I wasnt surprised he was calling. I always answered yelling something like Hey!, Yo! or Hey Ho Daddy-O!, expecting a chuckle then his fast talking New Jersey accent to invite me over to hang out or help out. But instead it was a mutual friend who was on the other end of the line. I thought maybe the phone was lost, someone was calling to get it back to the owner She told me Jim just died, a heart attack. I was in shock and asked if it was a joke as I quickly glanced at my computer to somehow hope to see the date of April fools day. But it wasnt the case.

    Jim was like a brother and befriended everyone who came in contact with him. He had an outgoing personality, a kind and generous heart and was at the musical center of our group of friends. His life long friends from NJ Billy and Harry just moved here last summer to be here as a group. Everyone loved, respected and cared about him and he would go out of his way to do anything possible for you, anything. Jim had his demons though, a tough younger life, as I found out, was at the root cause of these issues. We knew and we tried everything to help, my last heart to heart with him was about a month ago asking him to slow down and focus on getting some rest and getting his health better. Unfortunately, you cant watch someone 24/7 and some people who didnt care about him took advantage of him.

    I met Jim through the music site Bandmix 5 years ago, he liked my recordings I was posting and asked to come by, see what I was doing and we recorded our first track that day. It was one of those things when you meet someone for the first time and you instantly know you are going to become friends, it was that. We then set up his studio with similar computer, mics and a better interface and speakers than I had. He whipped out $200 and paid me for helping him set it up and I said I wouldnt take the money. I told him this was a hobby and was glad to help him whenever he needed it for free. He stuffed the money in my pocket anyway. A week later, the same interface and a new set of speakers showed up at my house so i had exactly what he had in case of questions. Unbelievable.

  2. 308224
    theHumps : Wed 18th Mar 2020 : 2 years ago

    As I lived about 5 towns north of Jim, he wanted nothing to do with the drive up to my house to record with me, so his wife and he were looking to invest in some property so they bought a house and moved me down to New Smyrna Beach. As I could in no way pay the rent in this house, full patio backyard, in ground pool, heated and screened, 5 min walk to the ocean.the house is awesome, Jim and his wife still charged me the same rent I was paying at my other house which was partially destroyed in a hurricane. A FUCKING HOUSE, REALLY?!?! Even Billy and I laughed about it yesterday how generous Jim was in my case. Karen, Jims wife, once said she thought I was Jims son because the way he treated me, we just became great friends. My friend Will is the same way, hes more a brother than friend.

    Jim bought people in his bands instruments valued at thousands of dollars, purchased large canopy tents for local vendors to shelter their outdoor customers on their patios and the list goes on. One night at 11:00 I saw him out and about as I walking home from having a pint and he offered a group of about 15 young adults who were busking on the street, along with their friends all hotel rooms if they didnt have a place to sleep for the night. Thats the kind of guy he was.

    Gonna miss my friend and my musical cohort, my brother. I loved his attack on the guitar and his instinct as to what would fit in one of my songs and we always saw eye to eye. He was ready to throw down some classical guitar on my new one but I cant seem to think about music right now. It was fun to watch him play and just be around him, you never knew what was going to happen or where you would go. We respected each other as people and musicians. My life changed last week and Im so saddened for everyone who knew him and loved him.

    Johnny put together a quick tribute vid, he also did facebook, Jimmy Stiles.

    Rest well Jimmy, miss ya pal.

  3. 671112
    Danke : Wed 18th Mar 2020 : 2 years ago

    Dear God My Friend!!!

    Can't say nothing more than my heart is broken too, even though I didn't know condolences Wayne...


  4. 630386
    JoeFunktastic : Wed 18th Mar 2020 : 2 years ago

    Hey Wayne. Sounds like he was a brother to you. I think I can relate to that kind of pain. My biological brother passed away a few months ago so I can only imagine the crushed feelings and heartache you must be going through at this time.

    Wayne, you have been there for me over the years, so this come with sincere compassion and benevolence, I am truly sorry for your loss man. Friends such as Jim, in the way you described him, are once in a lifetime friends if we are so blessed to have such a friend. This is clearly evident at the way your poured out your positive sentiments and soul about him.

    Nothing in life prepates us for such moments. All we can do is remember our loved ones and keep their life, kindness, love, and goodness alive in out hearts. We should never fail to mention them among our friends and family. Gone, yet always here. That will take some time getting use to Wayne. Johnny's video is amazing. Wayne, if you need me to call you let me know. I got your old phone number but I don't know if you changed it since you moved. Wayne, thanks for sharing Jim's memory. Take care Wayne!


  5. 1086187
    Orlando51 : Wed 18th Mar 2020 : 2 years ago

    So condolences Wayne !


  6. 308224
    theHumps : Thu 19th Mar 2020 : 2 years ago

    Thanks danke, appreciate your thoughts. He was one of a kind, that's for sure.

    Thanks Leon, what a loss of talent and big heart. We're all a big mess here.

    Thanks Joe, knowing what you've been through the past several years since we've know each other is a testament to how people's resiliency to loss, hardship, pain and change can be handled. For those who don't know Joe's been through a lot lately and he has been in touch with me for about 10 years from our association which began here. Joe's an inspiration to me and a hell of a nice guy as well. Someday we'll have that cup of coffee Joe.

    The vid was done by Billy's brother Johnny, a movie producer and features the Jersey Crew mostly and a few pics from his new bands, saw some cool pics of him, made me cry. Jim did the title song for the movie Jersey Justice. Jim's song comes in at about 1:50 and Billy is the guy who speaks at 2:15 and Johnny produced it. Here's the trailer, not for children:

    Here's where you can hear the song:

    Thanks guys.

  7. 630386
    JoeFunktastic : Thu 19th Mar 2020 : 2 years ago

    Wayne, whew! I am humbled. But this isn't about me. I wish I could have known your friend Jim. It sounds like we all needed a "Jim" in our lives. Such friendships are benificial to mankind in general Wayne. I just watched the video. Jim was/is greatness among us Wayne, but you already knew that. Jimmy's BandMix profile is impressive! He looks impressive there Wayne. You know, Buddha spoke of being peaceful and calm during one's death and he also spoke of the rebirth of one's life thereafter. My hope is that somehow Jimmy's presence and spirit will remain with you and his family as a positive force of love and hope. His musical acomplishments are very impressive. Wayne the current crisis must be complicating things for you, stay well man! You are in my thoughts and prayers. Amen.


  8. 500098
    ShortBusMusic : Sat 21st Mar 2020 : 2 years ago

    Aw, Wayne, I am so sorry for your loss. No words are adequate in these difficult times, so all I can say is hang in there, better days are ahead. RIP Mr. Stiles.

  9. 308224
    theHumps : Wed 25th Mar 2020 : 2 years ago

    Hey Joe, we all do need somebody like that in our lives. I want to say though that he wasn't a wealthy man, he gave because it made him feel good to help others. He worked hard all his life, invested well and retired early, good for him. He shopped in pawn shops for guitars but could have bought any guitar out there and was embarrassed because his minivan had sport rims and tires. lol

    My new song is called Avoidable and it's about Jim. I cried through every bit of singing on the first take and for the first few times going into the session. Honestly, it's helped me break through and move forward. I sent it to Billy, he wants to play on it but with everything going on these days, who knows when we will get together.

    Thanks Bear, wish could had the opportunity to swing over, you would have had fun playing with him and hanging out. He went 100 miles per hour so keeping up with him was damn near impossible but if you were playing along with him you had his full attention. Working on the new one has helped, music is great, isn't it?

    My friend said she can't even think about going out to see live music or listening to music for enjoyment now. I told her that music was in her blood and that Jim wouldn't want us to stop enjoying music. It has to be part of the healing process if music is part of you. It hurt to start a song about loss but music comes from emotion. Jim played with emotion like no other.

    A session piano player Mark Jordan once said: "It's not so much the notes that you play, it's the force of your personality on the notes that are already there." Jim played with extreme force. And I loved that and gonna miss that.


  10. 308224
    theHumps : Sat 18th Apr 2020 : 2 years ago

    And here is the song I put together for Jim called Avoidable:

  11. 2637561
    GomorTenzen : Sun 19th Apr 2020 : 2 years ago

    Dude I'm sorry for your loss, what a tough void. Music brings the best of souls together.

  12. 177447
    Unknown User : Thu 30th Apr 2020 : 2 years ago

    Hey Wayne, beautiful post, sorry for you lost, happy you found create outlet to deal with some of the pain and sadness in the coming days, months and years may you also find peace and hope for a better future.

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